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Wickedly Smart Women

Jun 24, 2020

Do you have a parent, partner or colleague who always has to be RIGHT? Do they blame you for things that you have no control over? If so, you may be dealing with a Hijackal. So, how do you identify when you’re in a toxic relationship? And more importantly, what can you do about it?

Rhoberta Shaler, PhD, is the Relationship Help Doctor behind Transforming Relationship, a platform designed to provide ongoing care for relationships in crisis. She focuses on helping the partners, exes and adult children of the relentlessly difficult people she calls Hijackals to ‘stop the crazy-making and save their sanity.’ Rhoberta is also the author of 16 books on toxic relationships, and she serves as the host of the Emotional Savvy and Save Your Sanity podcasts.

On this episode of Wickedly Smart Women, Rhoberta joins Emerald to walk us through the characteristics of a toxic relationship. She describes how Hijackals show up in personal and professional relationships, explaining what we can do to recognize their behavior and reclaim our sense of self. Listen in for Rhoberta’s insight on why fixing someone else’s behavior is not YOUR responsibility and learn the three hallmarks of a healthy relationship!

What You Will Learn

How growing up with Hijackal parents called Rhoberta to this work

How to identify when you’re in a toxic relationship

How the public perception of a Hijackal differs from their private behavior

What Rhoberta does to help people regain their sense of confidence

Why our adversarial court system favors Hijackals

How Hijackals show up in business relationships

The three hallmarks of a healthy relationship

How to recognize ‘love bombing’ in personal + professional relationships

How to identify when you’ve taken on Hijackal traits

Why fixing someone else’s behavior is NOT your responsibility

How Rhoberta’s spiritual life supports her in showing up + speaking out

Connect with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler

Transforming Relationship

Emotional Savvy Podcast

Save Your Sanity Podcast

Rhoberta on YouTube


Escaping the Hijackal Trap: The Truth About Hijackals and Why They are Crazy-Making by Rhoberta Shaler, PhD

Stop! That’s Crazy-Making: How to Quit Playing the Passive-Aggressive Game by Rhoberta Shaler, PhD

New Media Summit

Wrestling Rhinos: Conquering Conflict in the Wilds of Work by Rhoberta Shaler, PhD

KAIZEN for COUPLES: Smart Steps to Save, Sustain & Strengthen Your Relationship by Rhoberta Shaler, PhD

Connect with Emerald GreenForest

Emerald’s Website

Emerald on LinkedIn

Emerald on Twitter

Emerald on Instagram


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